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Reach you

Reach you

Originally published on Instagram

Reach you

All I need is to reach you.
It’s so easy.
I can see you through the thick veil of pain and suffering.

All I need is to reach you.
All I have to do is reach out through the flames.
My arm is burning, but who cares?
For a second, I almost touched you.

All I need is to reach you.
This is one of my easier exercises.
Every time I come near you, you lash out.
Every time you shout, my world shatters into a million pieces.
But when I cry, they are melting back into one piece again.
All that’s left are scars, pain, and a heart that grows up to be numb.

All I need is to reach you.
And I’ve become the best at this game.
Swallow my pride, swallow my tears.
Shut down my heart, that’s how I win.
It’s so easy, it became a second nature to me.

It could have all been so easy.
But life is not easy.
I did not take the chance to tell you how much I love you.
And you never told me, and now you’re gone.

All I need is for you to reach out.
Hold me, touch me, love me.
Tell me it’s going to be okay.
I don’t care if you hurt me, because I know you are hurt.

All I need is for you to reach out.
But below this pile of crap, I know there is a connection.
It is stronger than any dimension like space and time.
We had our moments of unspoken magic, love and divinity.
And in times of darkness, I hold on to them.

So in a way, we have reached each other long before.
Long before I could walk, or talk.
Along the way, I have forgotten myself.
Now, I am replaying our little game with myself.
It gets really tiring, and it’s not even half as fun.

All I need is for you to reach out.
I still need you.
People say I’m grown up now, but I feel like a baby.
My scars hurt, I am clueless, and I could use a little help.

All I ask is a little guidance, reassurance, and love.
I promise I will not waste it, because it’s precious to me.

All I need is for you to love me, support me, and guide me.
Is that too much to ask?

Published 19 Jul 2019

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